See You Around...Maybe

I think I'm taking a break from Blogging for a while. I’ll decide in a month or two if it will permanent. I have not been myself lately so I think I'm taking a break from blogging for a while. I don't know if it will be permanent like Liberal Banana or The Daily Dump, but I don't want to be one of those people who quits then comes back and claims that he missed you people. I won't miss you...

The One where I get Visitors from The Midwest

Well, I shoulda’ posted this weeks ago, but I had camera issues. Here’s the story: My old law school roommate’s family came for a visit to DC, so I met them out for dinner. I’m posting the pics on here (and the story) so that they can download the pics if they want them.When I was in law school, I lived with my friend, who we’ll call Tony Twist (because he’s from St. Louis, has a goatee and

Well, I shoulda’ posted this weeks ago, but I had camera issues. Here’s the story: My old law school roommate’s family came for a visit to DC, so I met them out for dinner. I’m posting the pics on here (and the story) so that they can download the pics if they want them.When I was in law school, I lived with my friend, who we’ll call Tony Twist (because he’s from St. Louis, has a goatee and

The One Where I Get Ripped Off By Mechanics

Well, I had some problems with the Ninja Lite Armoured Assaust Vehicle (N-LAAV) lately. Because Fridays usually suck for me, something went wrong with my clutch and I had to rent a car for the weekend.A fcucking Ford Taurus.I can’t even begin to catalog the ways a Ford Taurus is inferior to the NLAAV, but I’ll try. The NLAAV is higher up than the Taurus. In an urban combat situation (like running

Man vs Mouse

I got some pretty impressive snap traps set up. They look lethal and are definintely painful. I know this because I accidentally caught my finger on one as I was setting it up. If these traps will nab someone as smart as me, then that Mouse, won't stand a chance. In case you're wondering if it will avoid the trap due to some unbelievable brain power that it acquired in some top secret government

The One Where I Kill My Roommate...Sort of.

There are times when I regret being a nice guy—like yesterday, for instance. My rodent foe had been clever enough to avoid the poisons and glue traps until yesterday. I walked into my place after a night of swing dancing and I saw the li’l bastard stuck to the glue trap. And he was still alive. He was about the size of my thumb and squirmed when he saw me; at times I thought he would break free

Quickie Ninja Stock Pick

I didn't have time to post about this the other day, but the "food and breasts" stock has come out today. Sara Lee, the food company spun off its apparrel division as a separate company: Hanes. The new company includes Champion sweatshirts, Hanes Underwear, Playtex bras, Wonderbra, Barely THere and Just My Size. As part of my "research" I've been asking hot girls I know to email me pics of

The One Where I Plumb.

THE ONE WHERE I PLUMBBecause I am a masochist, I will now do a post about plumbing. This will prove to the naysayers that I once in a while, when Catholic Guilt overwhelms me, I do some actual work. Let’s just call a spade a spade and say that the plumbing gods don’t love me. While my little homemade waterfalls were frustrating in the past, now things are different. It sucks to have a river of

Polititcians: STAY OFF MY YARD!!!

The DC Mayoral elections are next week. I’m torn between indifference and laziness about this one. What bugs me most about these elections however, is the annoying habit of these political hacks to put their campaign signs up on your property without your permission. Fenty’s people posted a sign on the ninja fortress lawn (in front of the moat). My imaginary friend had it done to her house

Ninjas Helping Others

I've been thinking a lot about Karma lately. Was I being punished yesterday for killing the mouse? Why did the universe make me lose my cell phone (only to give it back to me later)? I volunteered recently to head up a big charity fundraiser that will take up a lot of my time over the next few months. It's already shaping up to be a LOT more involved than I thought it would be. At the time,

REWARD

I Lost My Cell Phone This Morning. Somewhere near the Columbia Heights Metro Station. Probably on 13th Street somewhere between Irving and Harvard. On the off chance that one of the tens of people that read this blog every month finds it, please get in contact with me. My whole life was in that phone. Me without my cell is like a politician without illegal bribes or hookers. HELP!UPDATEI kept